Isn’t it funny To think that your Daddy Was once a little babby Who cried, burped and dribbled And couldn’t even crawl! Isn’t it a tickle To think your Mammy was so little That her fingers were the size Of your baby toes, That she couldn’t even sit up And had to wear a nappy! Maybe you have two Mammies, Maybe you have two Daddies, Or one of them or three of them or neither, Or a Granny or a Grandad, Or an Auntie or an Uncle, Or a Cousin or a Nanny or a Minder. No matter who you have, Isn’t it absurd To imagine all the grown-ups Being little boys and girls! Isn’t it wild To think your teacher was once a child Who sat listening to their teacher Who was also once a child Who also had a teacher Who was once a child Who had a teacher Etcetera. Isn’t it a cackle To think you were an apple Squished inside the twinkle of an eye! This was before you were born of course, Before you knew what it means to be an apple, Or a horse. Maybe you really were an apple. Maybe you were a fish! Maybe you were Brussels sprouts, Half a carrot, or an onion. Maybe you were a mouldy crust Or a bin to put the rubbish in. Maybe you were mud Stuck to the sole of a shoe. Maybe you were a puddle To run and jump and splash through! Maybe you were snot Slipping free of someone’s nose, A someone who’s been dead Since before you had a nose And who could now be anything. Be anything! Anything goes! You are earth! You are clouds! You are grass! You are stars! You are definitely an alien from Mars. You’re a heron, a duck, a pig, a curtain. You’re definitely a curtain, Of that much I’m certain. You probably used to be wee and poo, Or was it that wee and poo used to be you? Both of them can make children very very sick If they don’t wash their hands after going to the toilet. What are you really? A child Or a goose? Are you one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, Eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve? Or are you a number even higher than twelve? Are you seven billion, four million, six hundred and twenty one and a half? Or are you the water you swallowed by accident in the bath? Did you know that your body’s over 60% water? What a laugh! Can you remember exactly what happened This time last year? Last month? Last week? What did you think Before you could speak? Be anything you like! There’s nothing else to be. Be the top of a mountain! Be the roots of a tree. If you accidentally grow up Don’t forget to be free.